Good Bastards Hall of Fame
James Hay
The Four Faces Of James
Before I get into this little discourse on old
James here, he’s forty this week for crying out loud and when you’re that age,
you think you’re old. Same as when you were four. It is important to note that
James won’t see this until this Saturday at his birthday, unless one of you
rotten bastards reading this goes and tells him.
All I can say is that Nugget, the footy coach out of the new book, will get his
bolt cutters around your balls if you even think it.
James is married to the devoted Bernadette and they both hail from Cromwell
having meandered up from Dunedin seven years ago. He is the local watchmaker.
They had been together twelve years to the day on the day they got married. Now
that’s a nice bit of tidy bookkeeping for you.
He tends to put up this persona as being a bit of a quiet bastard, preferring
the background rather than the limelight. Those that know him know that this is
a bit of a front, give him a couple of Good Bastards and the old verbal
diarrhoea kicks in and he’s bullshitting his heart to anyone that will listen,
even a post.
Someone close to him bought him a bib once that said Bull Shit Bib, just to
catch the drips as they were buggering up all his good shirts.
He has a great personal philosophy on life, which tends to orientate around a
few simple points. Misery loves company and why do today what you can put off
until tomorrow and do you really need to have an excuse to have a beer!!!!!
He doesn’t believe in giving flowers, as the bastards die, preferring instead to
draw them and fax them to cheer up a bad day a particular person might be
having.
He drinks his own home brew as well as Good Bastards Beer, is an avid member of
the black powder shooters club and is one of their most social shooters.
Heres to you James, welcome to the Good Bastards Hall of Fame, I look forward to
one day having a beer with you and wiping the drips off your chin.
Cheers
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